Depression affects about one in five men at some time in our lives. But what does
being 'depressed' really mean? When is being down a sign of illness, rather than normal sadness, frustration, anger
or stress?
There are a few pointers. First, doctors don't consider depression to be 'clinical' - meaning an
illness in need of treatment - unless symptoms have lasted for more than two weeks.
This kind of depression is
caused by changed brain and body chemistry, which doesn't happen overnight. In fact, depression often comes on so slowly
that many men have difficulty noticing the change.
Although depression is technically a mental illness, many of
the symptoms of depression are actually physical. Depressed people find it difficult to get to sleep, or to feel rested when
they wake. Waking through the night, or waking far too early in the morning, is quite a strong sign of depression.
Depressed people have little energy, and they often find it difficult to motivate themselves to do anything. Appetite and
interest in food diminishes, and many people lose weight. Aches and pains and a general physical weakness are also very common.
Thinking is affected too. For example, it can be difficult to concentrate, so that it's impossible to follow a
TV programme all the way through. Everything seems an effort.
Even short newspaper articles are a struggle, and
few depressed people can manage to read novels, even if this is something they used to enjoy. Memory also suffers, so that
it's hard (for example) to remember phone numbers, and easy to forget important things at work.
Other, subtler,
changes in thinking can be harder to spot. For example, people find that minor setbacks - things they would usually shrug
off - seem devastating. Problems in one area generalise, so that they seem to affect every aspect of life.
In
severe depression, people can feel that they're useless; that their lives are a waste of time; or that they must have
been guilty of something terrible. A few people hear voices that aren't really there (hallucinations).
It's
very common to feel you can't face the day, to wish you didn't have to wake up in the morning, or even to feel like
ending it all. Suicidal thoughts like this are a frightening symptom. Fortunately, most people don't act on them.
| Ask someone you trust
to monitor your mood |
Those closest to you will often
be able to recognise the early signs of depression. An agreement with a family member or friend as to how and when they could
point out the problem, and what the two of you do to address it, is invaluable.
The kind of tasks you could do
with your relative or friend include: stress auditing, thought and mood inventories, and talking about any incident that's
given the family member or friend cause for concern. |
Thinking
about suicide is one of the common symptoms of depression. These thoughts are 'the illness speaking': they aren't
logical or sensible, and not how you'd usually think.
Thoughts of harming yourself can be hard to get rid of
if you're on your own. Try to be with people (even if you're feeling rotten and not saying very much).
Confiding
in someone about suicidal thoughts doesn't make it more likely that you'll act on them. If possible, try to let someone
know how you feel. "I'm going through a rough patch" can be enough - you don't necessarily need to say more.
Try to distract yourself if the thoughts become too much: go for a walk, listen to music, or watch TV.
Make
sure you avoid alcohol or drugs - although they can ease some of the tension, they also make it much more likely that you'll
act impulsively, or will not be aware of what you're doing.
It's not unusual to experience some of the
signs of depression from time to time. But if the feelings are very strong all the time, there are things you can do to help
yourself.
- Notice 'thinking errors' - are you overgeneralising. For example, do you imagine every
pain is a deadly disease? Do you tell yourself everything is going wrong when only one thing has gone wrong?
- Balance
frightening thoughts with reassuring statements.
- Occupy your mind. Concentrating on something can lift your mood.
- Exercise. Physical activity relaxes you and makes you feel good.
- Pay attention to the way you look.
- Eat
a regular diet of wholefoods.
- Avoid alcohol. It's a depressant, even if it makes you feel temporarily better.
- Investigate alternative and complementary therapies.
